Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
