well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Randomize
