It's Friday. Sex?
i barfeds in our rink
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize