Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
