Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
