12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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