i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
