HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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