She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize