This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
