in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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