He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
