I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
My vagina just clenched in fear
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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