Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
