I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
