I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Randomize
