Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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