Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
