If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize