Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
