there's paper in my vomit.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize