Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
