Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
The police scanner is talking about you again....
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
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