think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
