Reggie can tackle my bush.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
We just shotgunned beers for America
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
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