it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
God, I missed his penis.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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