Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
