I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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