Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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