It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
