You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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