Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
