love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Why are your pants in the freezer?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
