this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
