I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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