Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
