fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
