Where did you get a picture of my penis
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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