i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
