no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
