Hey man sorry I got all grabby
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
