you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
