Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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