He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize