I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
