It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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