he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
