Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
