anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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