So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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