I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize